Motivating Mojo

Today, I banged out a 3.5 mile walk in the cold, brisk wind. My muscles were tight & it was mainly uphill, which slowed my times. But I am ok with it. Why? I got off the couch and moved. I put the past few days behind me and just did it. I woke up, griping that the Y doesn't open til noon on Sundays. (Side note: I'm seriously going to have to look into a new gym as the Y's hours SUCK) Still, I read another chapter in The Shift and realized I didn't necessarily have to have the gym. I had my own two feet and today that was good enough. Mock my times if you want. I truly don't care. I did 3.5 miles in exactly one hour. It was good enough for me and that's ALL that matters. Suck it haters. 

Watching an interview with Tory Johnson about her book, "The Shift", I realized that I am having a mental shift lately. I am simply fed up with being unhealthy and miserable. Just like any other addiction, we have to be fed up to make a change.  I am no longer focused on the numbers. For instance, I went to the gym this morning. How many calories did I burn? I have no idea. I just moved. I walked on the treadmill for about 20 min and biked for 30 min. I left the heart rate monitor and BodyFit at home. I simply focused on moving. The only number that matters to me right now is 30. My goal is to move 30 min/day every single day. I am throwing the scale away. I am not counting calories. I am not setting up unrealistic goals. I am simply cutting myself some slack and moving.  Next week, I am doing the New Years Day 5k here. My husband agreed to do it with me, which is a good thing. Will I be fast? No. With my shin/achilles pain, I simply want to finish. I don't care wh...

Watching last night's "Biggest Loser", I heard Jillian ask a contestant how he deals with things. He said, "Reactionary. With all the bad that's happened, it's the only way. Nothing has gone as I've planned." Jillian quickly responded, "Defense. You're on the defense." Talk about hitting home. Growing up playing basketball and softball, I won "Defensive Player of the Year" every single year. I was taught "Defense wins championships. Defense is the best offense." Not only did I pride myself on my defensive ability, I took it to the next level. Only last night did it hit me just how long I have lived by that motto. Losing my dad at age 11 and being left with an abusive family, I lived defensively. I had to for my survival. If they couldn't get to me, they couldn't beat me down. It explained why I was constantly striving to be the best, to not be vulnerable or let anyone hurt me. It literally permeated every a...

Today marks Day 3 of trying to cut back on sugar. I was reminded Saturday night, after a day of eating complete crap, just how badly sugar affects me. It makes me a raging bitch if I may put it bluntly. After a nasty fight with my husband and joints so swollen that it hurt to move, I realized (FINALLY) that I didn't just need to cut back, I had to cut back or face an early grave. The chemicals in my brain go haywire when I overload on sugar and seeing my loving husband completely exasperated was exactly what I needed. Sunday, I went to Louisville for the Justin Timberlake concert with my sister-in-law. I didn't worry about counting calories or getting my 10k steps in - I just focused on having fun and appreciating the moment. We spent the whole day looking at Christmas lights and shopping. It was probably close to 4 p.m. before I realized we hadn't eaten. Typically when I counted calories, I'd have been obsessed with my next meal, worried about my intake. But Sunda...

I was supposed to run the Jingle Bell 5k this a.m. Ironically, I woke up with joint pain so severe that I couldn't get out of bed at a normal time, much less walk a 5k. Once again, I failed. With the recent snowstorm, I haven't moved with purpose in several weeks. I have no desire to workout. Why? I see no point. No matter what I do, the scale doesn't budge any direction but up. I'm not sure where to go from here, but I know this: I am lost.